Self-esteem is as important to our well-being as legs are to a table. It is essential for physical and mental health and for happiness.
As I talk with more moms about discovering and embracing their purpose, I realize self-esteem is an issue preventing moms from fully living out their purpose.
If you are a mom who struggles with your self-esteem, you are not alone. Many moms struggle to properly evaluate their self-worth. This is something I struggled with when I became a mom. Here’s my story:
I graduated from Grove City College with a degree in Elementary Education and French Secondary Education. I got married and moved out to
eastern Pennsylvania determined to be the best teacher in the world.
I interviewed with a couple different districts and was hired to teach in a third grade classroom by Spring Ford School District. My husband and I had a 7-year plan. I would teach for seven years, and I would stop teaching to stay at home with our future children. This plan quickly turned into a year-and-a-half plan when Hannah arrived a few months into my second year of teaching!
I packed up my teaching hat and put on a mom hat. The adjustment to becoming a full-time mom was tough after all the praises of teaching.
It was winter, and we had just moved so I didn’t have a network of mom friends. I was lonely. I loved Hannah, but she couldn’t give me all that I
needed as a new mom.
I faced self-esteem issues.
I wasn’t using my teaching degree. I wasn’t contributing financially to our family, And I wasn’t receiving the accolades I had come to expect in the “working” world.
It wasn’t until our kids were in the preschool years that I began to hit my groove as a mom. During this period of time, my self-esteem began to rebuild. As I think back to this time, I see several things that helped to rebuild my self-esteem worth sharing:
5 Keys To Improving Your Self Esteem
1. Surround yourself with good people who will bring you up and not down.
Isolation is not healthy, and it’s just as unhealthy to surround yourself with people who bring you down. Plug into people who encourage you, who lift you up, and who recognize your worth. Joining and starting playgroups was my first step to finding other moms that I could exercise with and hang out with while our kids played. These moms positively impacted my self-esteem.
2. Listen to what God says about you.
What do you do first in the morning? Do you check your phone? Do you empty the dishwasher? Or do you spend a few minutes with your Bible?
“God’s Word is a lamp onto my feet and a light unto his path.” Psalm 119:105
It’s important to fill your mind with these truths as you start the day.
God’s Word reminds us that we are children of God and that we have value. Listening to God’s Word builds self-esteem.
3. Discover your gifts and talents, and find ways to use them.
You won’t be good at everything but you can excel at what you’re good at. What do you enjoy doing? Teaching on a very part-time basis when our children were young continued to light that spark in me and fulfilled my passion. Using your gifts and talents builds confidence and restores self-esteem.
4. Read and watch uplifting materials.
This is so important. What do we put into our minds? What do we spend time thinking about? Are we comparing ourselves to those around us? I like Paul’s words in Philippians 4:8:
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.“
Our self-esteem takes a hit when we listen to lies, but our self-esteem improves when we listen to truth.
5. Try something new.
I used to make a list of new things that I tried to do. Trying out new things helps build your confidence. These boosts of confidence can have a direct impact on your self-esteem.
Where you are is most important!
Being a mom is one of the hardest and most important roles you will ever have. Working on your self-esteem is a lifelong process. (I’m still working on mine!) Remember that society will tell you being a mom isn’t important, so find other friends and groups that will encourage you in your vital role.
Mothering matters, and you are worth it!