I don’t watch a lot of television, but my DVR is set to record my favorite talk show, The Rachel Ray Show. On a recent episode, Rachel Ray was doing a makeover on a mom. One of the statements the mom shared with the audience after her makeover stayed with me. She said, “Once you get into the mom thing, you lose who you are.”
Wow. How easily this can happen. In fact, you will lose your identity unless you take several steps. Here are five essentials to make sure moms keep their identity:
5 Keys To Keeping Your Identity When You Become A Mom
1. Don’t make your kids the center of your universe. You are a family before you had children. Your children are welcome members of your family, but you have to prevent them from becoming the focus.
2. Connect with your husband on a regular basis. For awhile when the kids were little, we had time to talk on the couch when Jon came home from work. The kids were taught to wait until after I had a few minutes to talk to Daddy. We looked for ways to go out just the two of us. Babysitting swaps, neighbor girls that babysit, and friends helped with this because we didn’t have family who lived in the area.
3. Set your priorities and live them out. I ended up in the hospital with postpartum issues because I didn’t take care of myself. Make sure you put yourself in your priorities. You are actually being selfish if you don’t put yourself as a priority because you cannot care for your family or be the person God created you to be when your priorities are unbalanced.
4. Keep yourself fit. I have a great friend that has always been my exercise buddy. We pushed our kids in double strollers in all kinds of weather and now walk the trail on the weekends sharing life and helping each other stay healthy.
5. Pamper yourself! Make an appointment to get your hair done. Treat yourself to a pedicure or a massage. When my mom gives me money for my birthday she always says to spend it on myself because she knows as a mom it’s so easy to buy for others.
You can keep your identity even while you are a mom, but you have to be intentional to make happen.